Calling Evil Good: The Problem Isn't "Them," It's Us! -- Isaiah 5:13, 20

Isaiah 5:13, 20


"Therefore my people have gone into captivity,
Because they have no knowledge;
Their honorable men are famished,
And their multitude dried up with thirst. (v. 13)

Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil;
Who put darkness for light, and light for darkness;
Who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!" (v. 20) (NKJV)

It seems, these days, that I’m hearing a lot of pastors talk more and more about how our society is naming what is evil good and what is good evil. And, I think all of us would have to admit, that American social norms and morals have changed significantly in the last 75-100 years. There is a reality that what wasn’t acceptable behavior in the 1950s is often now more than acceptable; it’s considered to be best practice.

But I’m wondering if we’re not looking in the wrong direction when we apply this scripture to what’s happening. I wonder if the problem, rather than being with society in general, isn’t centered first and foremost with the Church, with God’s people.

In the last few years, in a rather public display, Christians (or at least those professing to be Christians) have begun to refuse to provide retail and professional services to the LGBT community, particularly in the way of wedding and family services. Several bakers across the country refused to bake wedding cakes. A florist or two refused to provide flowers for weddings. Most recently a pediatrician refused to accept a new baby into her practice when she learned that the parents were married lesbians. All of these incidents were directly related to the issue of civil gay marriage. In every case, the person refusing the service has openly stated that they are against gay marriage and can’t, by reason by conscience, provide the service because they believe that gay marriage is against the laws of God.

Pastors, then, have also begun to stand up and reject this secular turn of events, stating that now our society is calling what is evil good and what is good evil ("Homosexuality is good" and "Christian values are bad"). They are saying that this verse in Isaiah (v. 20) is about the world’s behavior and the world’s values. They are vehemently protesting that things in our society have turned around and are suddenly backwards.

I disagree.

Oh, of course things in our secular, unsaved society are crazy wrong. Everyone who isn’t saved is crazy wrong. Scripture has already guaranteed that! None of us can make good decisions about our lives, about our behavior, without the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit to make us turn away from our sinful natures and embrace the righteous character of the most Holy God.

But this passage in Isaiah wasn’t written about unsaved people. It was written about God’s people! God’s people will begin to call evil good and to call good evil. "They" aren’t the problem; we are. And I’m not talking about the so-called Christians who are distorting the Bible in order to try to include gay marriage as an acceptable form of Christian behavior. I’m talking about those of us who have painted the red letter A on the chest of every non-Christian for their sinful behavior. I’m talking about you and me.

Now, I haven’t suddenly changed my own belief about what is sinful and what is not. Scripture is plain that sex outside of traditional marriage is sin. One cannot equivocate about that and still remain faithful to the idea that the Bible in infallible in the original manuscripts. No, what I’m talking about is that we have suddenly decided that there are sins committed by the unsaved that will somehow send them more to hell than other sins. Think about that for a minute. So there is an unsaved person who is LGBT. They get married or not. They have homosexual sin or remain celibate. They do whatever. If they are unsaved, they are doomed. It doesn’t matter whether or not they are LGBT. It doesn’t matter or not whether they are sexually active or not. It doesn’t matter whether they are married in the eyes of the government or not. If they are unsaved, their eternal destination is hell. Pure and simple. There isn’t anyone who can make any decision in life that will somehow send them more to hell than another decision. The fact is, our unsaved heterosexual neighbors are just as much going to hell. Homosexuality isn’t something that is more heinous to God than any other sin when it comes to determining where a person’s eternal destination is.

And that is something we need to seriously get in our heads and hearts. Why? Because I believe that Satan is using the current state of affairs in our society to get our eyes off what is actually really important and that is the ignorance among Christians of what the Bible says about how we are to live. Isaiah 5:13 (the beginning part of this passage) says: "Therefore my people have gone into captivity, because they have no knowledge." The Hebrew word translated here "knowledge" is da’at and has connotations of discernment, understanding, and wisdom (Strong’s H1847). I believe God is telling us that His people weren’t sent into captivity because of what they did, but rather because of the root of why they did it. Their reasons for their sin were their undoing.

Do you know that most Christians in America are frightfully ignorant of what the Bible says? We read Christian books, go to Christian conferences, listen to Christian radio, but we don’t study the Word, not like we should. And we really don’t know what the Bible says about interacting with the LGBT community. If we did know, things like refusing to provide services for weddings or treat babies wouldn’t be happening. The Bible doesn’t tell us to do those things. In fact, the Bible tells us just the opposite.

"I wrote to you in my epistle not to keep company with sexually immoral people. Yet I certainly did not mean with the sexually immoral people of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner—not even to eat with such a person." (1 Corinthians 5:9-11 NKJV).

God never meant for us to police the behavior of the unsaved around us. These dear deluded folks are simply acting according to their sin natures to which they are enslaved (Romans 6:15-23). But we are to police those within the Church, including ourselves, beginning with the idea that we are to ostracize those within our faith community who are sexually immoral . . . or covetous, or idolaters, or revilers, or drunkards, or extortioners. We are not to have any social interaction with them if they name themselves as Christians. (Notice that this list, while beginning with those who are sexually immoral, goes far beyond just those who have embraced sexual sin.)

We—those of us in the Church—are the ones who have things backwards. We are the ones calling evil good and good evil. We are willing to tolerate, to the point of ignoring, the sins of our Christian brothers and sisters, claiming that we aren’t allowed to judge their lives, but we turn around and persecute the unsaved LGBT community in the name of God. And yet Paul clearly tells us that he assumed we would keep company with sexually immoral unsaved people. Why? Because how else can they hear about the gospel unless the Christians around them embrace them with God’s love?

Oh, dear ones, we are the ones being sent into captivity because of our ignorance of what the Bible really says. We are the ones who are living in sin, calling what is evil good and what is good evil by persecuting the unsaved around us. We are the ones who are living upside down, refusing to be Christ’s hands and feet and heart in a dying world.

Inside our churches are people living in sin, people who claim the name of Christ, but who are living sexually immoral lives, Christians who are covetors, idolaters, revilers, drunkards, extortioners. We have refused to police ourselves, to hold ourselves and each other accountable for our sins. Instead, perversely, we have decided to label one group of sinners in our society as somehow more sinful than another group and to lay the blame of our society’s degradation on them! We are the problem, not them. We need to repent of our sin of ignorance, to repent of our own self-indulgence and sinfulness, and to reach out in love to those around us who are unsaved, regardless of how their "unsavedness" exhibits itself. Of course, they are sinning! They are slaves to sin and the only thing that will save them is the gospel! Our refusing to love them, to serve them, to embrace them won’t change them. We need to become the hands, the feet, the heart of the Savior!

© 2015 Robin L. O’Hare. All rights reserved. Permission granted for nonprofit and church groups to use this article in its entirety (including this notice). For other uses, please contact servinggodalone@yahoo.com.

Light Afflictions -- James 1:1

James 1:1


"James, a bondservant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, to the twelve tribes which are scattered abroad: Greetings." (NKJV)

James, a bondservant of God. It’s interesting that the King James translates this "bondservant" rather than slave. Traditionally in European culture, a slave was someone who was usually kidnapped from their home and sold into slavery by others (like the story of Joseph in the Old Testament). But a bondservant was someone who sold themselves into slavery, often to pay the debt of another. The connotation is that the subjection into slavery is the decision of the slave herself, not the decision of another. Isn’t that how it is with us? No one has forced us to become Christians; we have willingly made that decision. And yet, how is it then that it is so difficult for us to submit ourselves to the will of the Lord and to the service of others?

I think that often we are drawn into Christianity under rather false pretenses. Either we are "born" into a Christian family, or a family that claims to be Christian but has lives that are rather otherwise, or we are "convinced" that our lives would be totally "fixed" if we accepted Christ. Both are probably bad beginnings for a life that is neither easy nor bereft of suffering. To put it bluntly, being a Christian, while far the best choice, is difficult at its easiest and very painful at its most extreme. It is a life of self-denial, of embracing whatever God demands, and of very often trusting in the darkness. When we read that James defined himself as a bondservant of the God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, we need to understand that he had decided to live completely sold out to the will of God, regardless of what that will was, regardless of where it might take him.

Paul talks about all of the suffering that he went through as an apostle:

"In labors more abundant, in stripes above measure, in prisons more frequently, in deaths often. From the Jews five times I received forty stripes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods; once I was stoned; three times I was shipwrecked; a night and a day I have been in the deep; in journeys often, in perils of waters, in perils of robbers, in perils of my own countrymen, in perils of the Gentiles, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren; in weariness and toil, in sleeplessness often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness" (2 Corinthians 11;23-27 NKJV).

Yet, early in the same letter to the Corinthian church, Paul calls his sufferings "light afflictions:"



"For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory" (2 Corinthians 4:17 NKJV).

The Greek word translated here "light" is elaphros and means "easy to bear" (Strong’s G2347). Why would Paul say that? Because the pain is well offset by the eternal weight of glory that is working in and for us. Paul goes on to say:

"For we know that if our earthly house, this tent, is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. For in this we groan, earnestly desiring to be clothed with our habitation which is from heaven, if indeed, having been clothed, we shall not be found naked. For we who are in this tent groan, being burdened, not because we want to be unclothed, but further clothed, that mortality may be swallowed up by life. Now He who has prepared us for this very thing is God, who also has given us the Spirit as a guarantee" (2 Corinthians 5:1-5 NKJV).

This "earthly house" Paul talks about are our physical bodies, but not just our bodies, but in essence this life that we live here on earth. And his perspective on this "life" here is amazing. In verse 4, he says "that mortality may be swallowed up by life!" Despite everything we might try to think and say to convince ourselves, as human beings, we know that we are dying. We know that this life is filled with more misery than joy. We know that things here on earth are, simply put, messed up. We want something more and we try to get it through political, financial, social, and even sexual means, but nothing really works! Why? Because this isn’t really life. This is life messed up by sin. Sin permeates all of creation. There’s no way to get around it.

"For all creation is waiting eagerly for that future day when God will reveal who His children really are. Against its will, everything on earth was subjected to God’s curse. All creation anticipates the day when it will join God’s children in glorious freedom from death and decay" (Romans 8:18-21 NLT).

All of creation—the entire universe—has been subjected to the penalties of sin. That is why both the apostles Peter and John write about the new heavens and the new earth that will someday be created (2 Peter 3:13, Revelation 21:1). This creation, so permeated with sin, cannot be saved; it must be destroyed and a new creation made for God’s people. We have the promise of new bodies and a new creation in which to live. This is why Paul called his sufferings light afflictions. This is why James was willing to become a bondservant of the Lord Jesus Christ. This is the promise that brings us hope. We aren’t looking for a better life here within this creation that cannot be fixed, cannot be saved. We are looking for a perfect life in the new creation waiting for God’s people! We are willing to do whatever He asks for us now because He is preparing for us a life—an eternal life—that is so wonderful, we can’t even begin to imagine what it will be like.

© 2015 Robin L. O’Hare. All rights reserved. Permission granted for nonprofit and church groups to use this article in its entirety (including this notice). For other uses, please contact servinggodalone@yahoo.com.

I Need A Savior -- Psalm 70:5

Psalm 70:5


"But I am poor and needy;
Please hurry to my aid, O God.
You are My helper and My Savior;
O Lord, do not delay!" (NLT)

I need a Savior.

As I have gotten older, I’ve become more and more self-aware, aware of my limitations, aware of my faults, aware of actually how little control I have on my life. But more than that, I’m aware of how close I live to the abyss, to the point at where I am lost and alone and terrified of life.

All of us, in the darkness, when we can no longer try to pretend, live in the same place. There is that moment when life threatens to crash in, destroying the "best laid plans of mice and men" and we realize that we are facing a future for which we are totally unprepared. It doesn’t matter how much we think we are prepared. The forces which battle for this earth are far greater than our limited resources, far stronger than our feeble strength, more far reaching than we ever could imagine. It doesn’t matter whether or not you buy into the idea of global conspiracies, fatalism, or the power of optimism. It doesn’t matter whether or not you’re a conservative, a liberal, or an independent. It doesn’t matter whether or not you live in a developed nation or a developing one. The fact is—the undeniable fact is—there are powers at work beyond our control and life, at the very point that we thought we had all of our ducks in a row, has a habit of crashing in and destroying all our hopes, our plans, and our futures.

We need a Savior.

"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places" (Ephesians 6:12 NKJV).

The battle exists on a spiritual level. That means that regardless of the laws we pass, regardless of the government under which we live, regardless of the efforts that we make to change our society, the battle goes on and it can only be fought at a spiritual level. The battle may appear to be in another realm; it may appear to be societal, political, financial, or legal, but it’s not! The only battle against humankind, the only battle that’s being waged, the only battle we need to address is the spiritual battle of Satan and his minions against the Almighty God and His armies. There is no other battle!

It’s taken me a long time to realize that every attack, every heartache, every struggle is related. The hurts of this world seem so diverse, so disconnected. The daughter of a famous singer lying in a coma. The persecution of Christians by a terrorist group. The passing of laws limiting the exercise of religious beliefs. The increase of resources for the rich and the decrease of resources for the poor. The divorce of a dear friend. A child suffering from cancer. The increase of autism and Alzheimer’s. The loss of jobs. The increase in the price of food. The list goes on and on of the events and circumstances which bring suffering into the lives of those we know and those we know of. And yet, if we take the Bible at it’s word, if we believe that what the Holy Spirit has said is true, then there is only one battle and what’s at stake are the eternal souls of everyone who has every lived.

I think of horrible tragedies, homes burning down or terrible car accidents. But when people walk away alive, the common agreement is, "You can replace stuff. You can’t replace lives." As Christians, we need to begin to have that kind of perspective, but on a far greater, more significant level. You can’t replace souls. Souls are eternal; everyone has one. And the battle that’s waging is for our very souls.

We need a Savior.

A number of years ago, I had a nervous breakdown. While many of my friends didn’t realize what was happening to me, I was spending most of my days sitting in a corner of my walk-in closet. I didn’t eat. I didn’t take care of my children. I didn’t help around the house. I simply sat in a closet, terrified of life. Twice a week I’d get dressed and go to church. I had a "role" I could act out and, in the comfort of that structure, I was able to function for brief periods of time. But most of the time, I was paralyzed by the anger, hurt, and fear that permeated my life. My beloved doctor tried various drugs, to no success. Most of them actually made me crazier!

What I needed was a Savior.

Oh, I believe I was still a Christian during that time, but I needed the Holy Spirit to reach in and tear away my self-pity. Only when my dear husband came and prayed for me, a prayer of desperation that God Himself would release me from the prison I’d created, did I begin to get better. I so needed a Savior because I was unable to save myself.

The world is unable to save itself. Different laws won’t save us. Different spouses or jobs won’t save us. Different doctors or lawyers or religious structures won’t save us. We need a Savior. We need the Savior. Only in His power and through His will can the spiritual battle that is the foundational problem of everything be won. And we need more than a Savior at the end of an aisle when we said the "sinner’s prayer." We need the Savior every day for every moment that we face life.

We need the Savior!

　

© 2015 Robin L. O’Hare. All rights reserved. Permission granted for nonprofit and church groups to use this article in its entirety (including this notice). For other uses, please contact servinggodalone@yahoo.com.

Exceedingly Wicked: That Includes Me -- Jeremiah 17:9-10

Jeremiah 17:9-10


"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; Who can know it? I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, even to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his doings." (NKJV)

"More than anything else, a person’s mind is evil and cannot be healed" (NCV)

"The human heart is most deceitful and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?" (NLT)

Very recently, Stephen Frye, a British comedian gave an interview to television host, Gay Byrne, on the show, The Meaning of Life. One of the questions Byrne typically asks on his show was what his guest might say to God if he saw God face to face. This was Frye’s response (answering what he would say to God):

"How dare you create a world in which there is such misery that is not our fault? It's not right, it's utterly, utterly evil. Why should I respect a capricious, mean-minded, stupid God that creates a world that is so full of injustice and pain?" (http://www.gaystarnews.com/article/tv-host-asks-atheist-stephen-fry-question-about-god-you-have-watch-what-happens-next300115#sthash.nZohnqzl.dpuf)

"How dare You create a world in which there is such misery that is not our fault?"

Most Christians would simply gloss over this response, knowing it is a typical response of a nonbeliever, but I think that Fry’s response is important for us to consider. Why? Because this is the heart of the world view of many people: that people are fundamentally good, so the evil in the world isn’t "our" fault. This incorrect and poor way of looking at things causes all kinds of problems. In fact, this is one of the greatest problems in the Church today, because we use this errant view to divide the "good people" from the "bad people." You see, if we believe that everyone is born "good," then when they do "bad" things, it becomes their choice. And if their choice is "bad," then they are now necessarily "bad people" (or "evil people"). It’s as if life is about those who wear the white hats and those who wear the black hats. And we do everything we possibly can to continue to this immensely bad doctrine.

Scripture tells us that the heart—our hearts—are "desperately wicked." Don’t you recognize that in your own heart? I know that my heart is desperately wicked, that I’m constantly doing things that hurt others, that ignore God’s will, that I know fail to bring glory to my Lord Jesus.

Paul understood this inescapable nature of being human: "I am carnal, sold under sin. For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do." (Romans 7:14b-15 NKJV).

"What I hate, that I do."

The psalmist wrote:

"God looks down from heaven upon the children of men, to see if there are any who understand, who seek God. Every one of them has turned aside; they have together become corrupt; here is none who does good, no, not one." (Psalm 53:2-3 NKJV).

We need God’s mercy and forgiveness precisely because we are so innately wicked! Not them. Us! Me! When we sing "Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me," I totally understand why John Newton chose those specific words. He understood himself; he knew that he was capable of justifying evil deeds; he knew how wicked his own heart truly was.

A recent article on the Internet address this specific song and that word, "wretch":

"That first day at Grace Pointe, an interdenominational church with a membership of about 1,500, the pastors were leading an old-fashioned hymn sing. When they got to ‘Amazing Grace,’ Pastor Melissa Greene said something that ‘hit me right square between the eyes,’ Wigden says. Speaking about the line ‘that saved a wretch like me,’ Greene said the church didn’t agree with the word ‘wretch.’ ‘It doesn’t matter what you’ve done or who you are, you were born beloved by God,’ Wigden says she told the congregation." (http://news.yahoo.com/bible-belt-evangelical-church-embraced-gay-rights-201800629.html)

Of course we are beloved by God, but that doesn’t make us any less sinners and wicked. "God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8 NKJV). The idea behind Pastor Greene’s words is that God loves us because He must have found something loveable in us. The Bible speaks so much to the contrary of that notion. God demonstrated His love, not our worthiness, in that Christ died for us while we were still sinners. The word used here is hamartolos and means "devoted to sin, a sinner; not free from sin; pre-eminently sinful, especially wicked." (Enhanced Strong’s G268).

We don’t want to hear that. We want to look at ourselves and find not find ourselves lacking. We feel better about ourselves if we can find something redeemable within our own hearts and perhaps find something less redeemable in the hearts of those with whom we have disagreements. But the Lord knew that we would think that way:

"Every way of a man is right in his own eyes" (Proverbs 21:2b NKJV).

"All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes" (Proverbs 16:2a NKJV).

We cannot trust our own hearts, our own valuations of people around us. There are no white hats and black hats; there are no good guys and bad guys. There are simply sinners (including me) who are desperately in need of the salvation that our Lord so graciously offers.

© 2015 Robin L. O’Hare. All Rights Reserved. Permission granted for nonprofit and church groups to use this article in its entirety (including this notice). For other uses, please contact servinggodalone@yahoo.com.

Four Things We Should Teach Our Children -- Proverbs 22:6

Proverbs 22:6


"Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."

I’m a special ed teacher at an elementary school. Most of my students have difficulty with social interactions. They don’t get social cues; they don’t understand subtlety, humor, and sarcasm (though they often try to use it); and they don’t know what to do when they hurt someone. Frankly, though, those kinds of difficulties in dealing in society seem to be far more pervasive than simply with students in special education. More and more kids (and adults) seem lost when trying to navigate civilly. To put it bluntly, we are creating an uncivil world and it doesn’t have to be that way. It is possible for children to interact civilly if we take time to teach them.

Recently, my class was working on a word processing project. We were near the end of the project with many hours already put in with the processes of writing and editing. One of my students, whose parents have told me that he has a great deal of difficulty making friends, thought it would be funny to reach over and punch a few keys on a fellow student’s computer. The result wasn’t nearly as funny as he had anticipated. It was, in fact, immediately disastrous. It caused that other student’s work to entirely disappear from the screen! Fortunately, the file had recently been saved and I was able to retrieve it for the student. But it wasn’t even the initial act that so distressed me. It was that the student who caused the chaos thought that even the missing file was funny and refused to apologize (and apologize profusely) for the distress he had caused.

Pain is funny. Distress is funny. We see it every day in the media. Many of our comedy shows and movies are based on pain and distress. But we know that, in real life, pain is never funny. Distress is never funny.

This morning I was reading on the Internet about a student who was recently expelled for pulling a knife on a another student and saying, "Snitches get stitches." The incident so intimidated the student that she was out of school for almost two weeks in fear of returning. The mother of the perpetrator had these things to say: "He’s not a dangerous child. He’s a good kid. Boys will be boys. He did everything they said, but he’s not malicious. They’re kids. Kids say dumb things. But does it mean my son is bad? He’s not." And she continued to assert that he shouldn’t have been expelled for his behavior.

Pain is belittled. Distress is belittled. The mom was more concerned about trying to defend her son and make everything think that he was an okay kid. He may have been. But the fact is that he used a weapon against another student and threatened her. That’s a serious issue that shouldn’t be belittled. Where was her concern about her son’s extremely antisocial behavior? If he was willing to use a knife to threaten a little girl—and he likely did it because he thought it was funny—then what might he do when he’s 12? 16? 20? Would he continue to use weapons as a method of amusement?

Recently our country has become even more aware of the racial inequities between police practice and racial minorities. There is a strong truth in DWB (driving while black) or WWB (walking while black) in that young black men are accosted—often for no reason—far more often by police officers than any other group in society. There’s something very wrong with that practice! That being said, there is also a widespread growing antagonism toward authority and a feeling among all groups that it’s okay to violate laws and civil constraints if one wants to. This isn’t restricted to just one group, but rather is becoming an almost pervasive feeling in America.
"Whatever they should do, people don't obey laws they strongly oppose. . . . And I think that each of us has both a right and a duty to undermine laws that intrude on our rights and oppress our freedom." (http://www.tuccille.com/blog/2008/03/should-we-obey-law.html)


This is an interesting and thoughtful essay and I would encourage everyone to read it; however, I believe there are two flaws in this way of thinking. First, it pre-supposes that everyone possesses a morality or personal moral code that would produce a healthy society. Secondly, it assumes that people would embrace that moral code in all situations, rather than reverting to their own indulgences.

The fact is, we as a society are in trouble. We are most in trouble because we have come to believe that, at the core, people are good. As Christians, we should know (and should base our decisions upon the fact) that we aren’t good at all; we are, in fact, desperately wicked: "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked" (Jeremiah 17:9 NKJV). The connotation in the Hebrew is that there is not even a cure for this wickedness. While we are born innocent (unable to see that we are in need of salvation), we are not born good. We need the Lord’s mercy and forgiveness, we need His righteousness put upon us, in order to be good. But we aren’t born good. Not one of us!

As Christians we should be well aware of that fact, not only because it says so in God’s Word (and that should be enough), but because we know it in our hearts! We know our own heart and we know how desperately wicked we can be and are when we act apart from the Holy Spirit. So it shouldn’t take anything for us to know that our society, without the morality of God, is going literally to hell.

It is happening to our children . . . and it is happening to them because we are failing to teach them how to embrace morality. Even many children growing up in Christian homes are losing their way! And as a teacher in a public school, I see at least four things we need to stop doing in order to help our children.

(1) We need to stop "teaching" them that jokes that hurt others are funny.

Jokes that hurt others isn’t a new phenomena nor is it an isolated incident. P. Valerie Dauphin, a student at Penn State, did a study on sarcasm in social situations. She began by defining sarcasm:

"Sarcasm is a large component of social interaction and conversation. To demonstrate a sense of humor, people frequently use sarcasm as a means of ‘breaking the ice’ during initial encounters with others. People also use sarcasm as a means of being comedic with groups of friends. They say something contrary to what they feel and/or believe for the purpose of being funny. Sarcasm, in these instances, seems harmless and playful. But is it really? Too much sarcasm is annoying and hurtful, but can even a minimal amount be too much?"

She then went on to analyze her study:

"It is interesting to note that every male, except one, viewed sarcasm as lighthearted humor, whereas the females were divided on the issue. Males expressed more tolerance of this type of verbal aggression. It is also interesting to note that they did not view sarcasm as a form of aggression. Their approval is apparent in their responses to question 3 in the survey. None of them viewed sarcasm as a negative thing. Another interesting thing is while four females thought females make more sarcastic remarks than males, no male thought similarly. In addition, a majority of the males said they are sarcastic most of the time while a majority of the females said they are rarely sarcastic. These two findings support the statement that sarcasm is a male-dominated form of communication." (http://ccat.sas.upenn.edu/plc/communication/valerie.htm)

Dauphin characterizes sarcasm as "verbal aggression" and yet in the results of her study, none of the males viewed sarcasm as a negative thing. Now of course this study is nowhere definitive, but I believe there is validity in saying that it is at least representative of the views of many people in our society who embrace hurtful humor as valid communication and social interaction.

We have taught our children that hurting someone else can be funny. But what does scripture say?

"Whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you" (Philippians 4:8-9 NKJV). Is it noble to make fun of someone else? Is it just to laugh at their expense? Of course not! And we need to teach our children that "all those jokes" need to be gone from our lives, from our conversation, from even our thoughts.

(2) We need to teach our children that for much of life, there are no do-overs.

I’m an avid computer gamer. I love all kinds of board games and with computer graphics, playing games takes on a whole new level. You can live fantasy lives, build cities (my favorite is building roller coasters that, in real life, I would be terrified to ride), run races, even fly airplanes and space ships! And of course, the amazing thing about computer gaming is that even if the game lets you "die," you are instantly reborn to try again.

Many of our kids spend a lot of time playing computer games. And so, our kids play games where they can "die" and they come back to life to start again. How do I know this? Because, during their free time, your kids play those kinds of games on my computers at school.

When it comes to games, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with allowing someone to "get killed and start over." But our children need to know that there aren’t usually do-overs in life. Once we mess up, instead of being able to start over, we have to deal with the consequences of our mess. Often those consequences touch the lives of those around us and we have ended up, even unintentionally, hurting others.

The fact is, do-overs are great for gaming, but life isn’t a game. Our children often don’t understand the difference. Most of my school kids believe that everything they see on television is true; so do many of their parents! We can’t assume that maturity will somehow sort out the differences for our children. We need to teach them the difference between fantasy and reality, the difference between a do-over in a game and being stuck with the consequences of real life. I learned being stuck with consequences very early in my life.

My mom had a drawer full of beautiful scarves. She would often let me play with them at home. I loved all the colors and designs. A number of scarves had stories behind them that Mom would share with me. One scarf in particular fascinated me. It was a map of the United States. Mom had explained to me that she probably could never find another like it and that I needed to be careful with it.

One day when I was in the car with my family, I had that scarf. I took it and held it out the window, watching it fluttering in the wind as the car went down the street. Mom warned me that doing that wasn’t a good idea, but I kept on. Suddenly the scarf was pulled out of my little hand and was gone! For whatever reason, we couldn’t stop and go look for it. I was devastated because I knew I had lost one of my mom’s favorite scarves. There was no do-over!

Parents often try to soften the consequences of childish decisions. The mother of the boy with the knife was perhaps doing that when she was trying to "explain away" his actions. I would have been more convinced that she loved him if she had taken a much harder stance and identified with his terrified victim. That boy doesn’t need his actions excused away; he needs to understand that he crossed a line, a line that should never have even been approached. He didn’t just have a knife at school and show it to kids; he threatened another student with it. He threatened to cut her to the point she would need stitches! This boy doesn’t need to be defended; he needs to be taught that he can’t behave like that . . . ever . . . again! It wasn’t kid stuff. It wasn’t a dumb thing. It was a serious threat! This boy needs to learn that he has terrorized that little girl to the point where she is afraid to come to school, where the family is afraid they may all be harmed. He needs to understand that he can’t take this back or get a do-over. His actions have consequences and some of those consequences cannot be undone.

Life doesn’t offer do-overs. Our kids need to know that.

(3) We need to teach our children that there is no such thing as an excuse for age, immaturity or ignorance.

Children need to be given limits at a very early age and then taught that they cannot cross those limits, regardless of the situation. Why? Because children lack the wisdom of experience to make good choices. They make choices based on their lusts. "I want this." It feels good; it tastes good; it will attract attention.

I have children come to school in the snow without jackets because they were more concerned about watching television before school than getting ready. Is that a wise decision? Of course not, but it’s predictable since a child can only make a decision based on the indulgence of the moment. They don’t know how to self-discipline or self-sacrifice; those are skills they have to be taught. (In fact, many adults I know don’t know how to self-discipline or self-sacrifice.)

We often excuse self-indulgent and lustful decisions as being due to age and there is some validity in that! Paul tells us that wisdom is discussed with those who are mature: "We speak wisdom among those who are mature" (1 Corinthians 2:6 NKJV). One can have an amount of spiritual maturity at a young age, but most of us require a number of years of living, of falling down and getting back up again, of failing and trying again, before we even begin to reach maturity.

But just because one isn’t mature isn’t an excuse for stupid stuff! God gave us parents for a reason and that is because the immature shouldn’t be making decisions, and if they are, those decisions should be make within very strict limitations. That being said, it’s wrong for us to use immaturity or youth to excuse harmful behavior. There is no such thing as "it was just kids being kids" that can excuse the kinds of insanity that our children are allowed to do to each other. Children prior to the teen-age years do not self-regulate well. They usually don’t learn from their mistakes.

"Eight-year-olds learn primarily from positive feedback ('Well done!'), whereas negative feedback ('Got it wrong this time') scarcely causes any alarm bells to ring. Twelve-year-olds are better able to process negative feedback, and use it to learn from their mistakes." (http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/09/080925104309.htm)

This study is based on finding an "average" among a number of test subjects. That means that there are even twelve-year-olds who cannot process negative feedback. We need to wisely know our child in order to know if they are truly able to handle learning from their mistakes.

For the most part, if children get away with one thing, they will try something more daring the next time. Even if they get caught, they will often continue to try something that reaches beyond what they did before. (This is even true for many adults). They need wise parents to teach them that there may be some things they do where the consequences could be life changing!

As I was growing up, my mom continually taught me to cherish the things I had, even the most trivial toy, because if something was lost or broken, there wasn’t enough money to replace it. I didn’t know at the time how real that lesson was to my mom. When she was a child, her parents divorced. My grandmother had made a hasty decision as a young teen to marry a man who she didn’t know well, a man who swept her off her feet, but a man whose temper was as yet unknown to her. Ten years later, after suffering years of abuse, my grandmother—during a time when divorce was not common—divorced her husband and fled with her 9-year-old daughter, my mom. Without the resources to find shelter, my grandmother and mom moved in with relatives, relatives who themselves had a very small house. Because of that, my grandmother and mom could only have one small suitcase between them for all their worldly possessions. My mom had to give up all of her toys and dolls, including a beautiful Shirley Temple doll that she greatly cherished. My grandmother’s decision to marry without thought created consequences that were life changing for herself and her young daughter. It doesn’t matter that my grandmother was a teen and that teens make stupid decisions. The consequences were nevertheless very real and very severe.

Our children need to be taught, very early on, that life is unforgiving. We, as those who love them, may always forgive them as does the Lord, but there may still be consequences that are hard to face and yet must be. Children must be guided to learn to make decisions based on facing the consequences so that they can learn to make wiser decisions. We shouldn’t have to excuse behavior due to youth.


(4) We need to stop teaching our children that failure is never bad.

Failure isn’t bad . . . sometimes. Thomas Edison is often heralded as an example of not giving up due to failure. When inventing the lightbulb, Edison continued to try:

"When it didn't work the first time, Edison made a note of exactly what he'd done and what components he had used. Then he made an adjustment to the experiment and tried again. And when that "failed" he made a note of that, readjusted and tried again. He kept learning from every experiment. He learned all the ways that it wouldn't work. He discovered all the chemicals and elements that wouldn't work. And each time he found a way that wouldn't work, he knew he was closer to finding a way that would work.

It took him approximately 10,000 experiments to invent the perfect set-up for the electric light bulb. There was a lot of learning to go through. Nobody had done it before. He couldn't read a book about it. He simply had to plug away, failing and learning, until he and his muckers worked out the right way to do it." (http://www.wilywalnut.com/Fail-Fast-Success-Failure-Wonderful-Edison.html).

The thing is, this idea—that failure can be the precursor to success—isn’t a universal truth. In other words, it works sometimes and sometimes it doesn’t! Failure only works as a precursor to success when the consequences of failure aren’t such that they prevent another try. What if Edison, in trying to invent the light bulb, had succeeded in electrocuting himself? He wouldn’t have been held up in esteem as the great inventor who failed 10,000 times only to succeed the 10,001! He would have, instead, died in obscurity.

With the advent of the Common Core in public schools, we are now told, as teachers, to encourage our students to fail. I totally understand the logic behind this and applaud this wisdom in certain circumstances! However, like most governmental mandates, it seems to be an all-or-nothing proposition.

The fact is, we need to stop teaching our children that failure is never bad and teach them what scripture says, that we are fallible human beings whom God loves and whom He will forgive if we accept His salvation. We need to teach them to follow His will with that will being the path of success. We need to teach them that earthly success is meaningless if we fail to please God.

We also need to teach them that there are many instances where failure will bring serious consequences. Failure to obey the laws of the land may result in being thrown in jail. Failure to respect others may result in loss of relationship. Failure to obey authority may result in loss of jobs. There are many failures that have serious and life-changing consequences. But if we teach our children to follow the Lord Jesus, they won’t ever need to be afraid of failure because His way is life. It’s always life!

© 2015 Robin L. O’Hare. All Rights Reserved. Permission granted for nonprofit and church groups to use this article in its entirety (including this notice). For other uses, please contact servinggodalone@yahoo.com.

Biblical Literacy: Adding to Virtue Knowledge -- 1 Peter 1:5-7

1 Peter 1:5-7


"For this very reason, you must make every effort to support your faith with goodness, and goodness with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with endurance, and endurance with godliness, and godliness with mutual affection, and mutual affection with love." (NRSV)

We are to add to our faith virtue (or goodness) and then add to our virtue knowledge.

I find it interesting that Peter places virtue before knowledge. This isn’t any kind of special knowledge; it’s simply the knowledge that comes from learning, from study. It is another word that describes, simply put, literacy. Peter is saying that we can’t understand what we read until we have decided to control our behavior and our choices. But once we do that, then we need to add knowledge to that virtue.

Illiterate and literate. These are two words that I use almost daily, being a teacher. For me, working in an elementary school, these words immediately describe the state of a student’s ability to use the English language. A student who is literate can both pronounce and understand what she reads. A student who is illiterate struggles with pronunciations, even of simpler words, and often has difficulty understanding what was read.

Literacy can apply to any number of subjects. Someone who is literate in math understands math concepts and can use them to solve math problems. Someone who is literate in science can define science terms and discuss, at length, various scientific concepts.

There is also spiritual literacy, biblical literacy. Literacy for a believer has to do with knowing what the Bible says and being able to accurately apply it to their lives. And there are various levels of literacy for Christians.

The first level of literacy is general familiarization. This would be similar to learning how to recognize and pronounce words in reading literacy. When a child learns how to read, he first learns the sounds of the letters, then how the sounds are blended together, then how to recognize syllables, and so forth. He then learns the meanings of new words. In the first level of biblical literacy, it’s important for the Christian to become just generally familiar with the structure of the Bible, the fact that it’s divided into two sections (with a 400 year gap in between), the issue of why certain books were accepted into the Bible and why others weren’t, why the books are divided the way they are and so forth. There are any number of websites that can be used to learn introductory literacy. Doing a quick search, I came up with a couple (but there are more):
http://basicsofthebible.org/studyguide/index.html

http://www.teensundayschool.com/97/overview/bible-basics.php


It’s important for believers to have a firm grasp of the basics of biblical literacy so that we can "rightly divide" the word of truth (2 Timothy 2:15).

The second level of literacy is getting a general familiarization with each book of the Bible. This is easily done by simply reading through the Bible. There are a vast number of "plans" that allow you to read through the Bible in a year. Here’s one plan that organizes you to read through the Bible in 90 days: http://www.biblestudytools.com/bible-reading-plan/ninety-day-challenge.html. Reading through the Bible once—simply reading it—is important to get a good overview of what each book actually says. When you read through the Bible, you are doing that, just reading. You are getting the bigger picture.

The third level of literacy is then to begin studying more in depth. This level of literacy is actually divided into three parts of study: Biblical deep study, doctrinal study, and historical study. At this point, the believer should begin to add Christians books to their study (but not to substitute those books for the Bible). It’s important to know which books to read (and which authors to trust). Pastors or trusted Christian elders may be able to point you in the right direction (though, unfortunately, not all pastors are readers). Some authors that I recommend to other Christians include A. W. Tozer, John Wesley, Paul E. Billheimer (particularly Destined for the Throne), and Alan Redpath. There are also good resources on the Internet, though you have to be very careful because there’s a lot of junk out there as well.

Once a believer has reached the third level of literacy, she should begin to learn about the various doctrinal positions presented in the Bible, be able to compare those with the church of her choice, and then research those in scripture. This is a lot of work, so you may want, at this point, to join up with other believers in a study group to do this together. But it’s important to know what various doctrines believe and then to prayerfully decide where the Lord would have you.

Unfortunately, in America, biblical illiteracy is becoming more and more prevalent:

"According to the 2014 ‘The State of the Bible’ report by Barna Group and American Bible Society, a majority of U.S. adults (81 percent) said they consider themselves highly, moderately or somewhat knowledgeable about the Bible. Yet less than half (43 percent) were able to name the first five books of the Bible. The statistics are similar to the previous 2013 report which also showed that only half knew that John the Baptist was not one of the 12 apostles." (I highly recommend reading this entire article if you are interested in this issue: http://www.christianpost.com/news/biblical-illiteracy-in-us-at-crisis-point-says-bible-expert-121626/)

The problem with biblical illiteracy is that it stands between us and Christian maturity. We cannot move onto self-control, endurance, and godliness until we actually learn what scripture has to say about these things. We cannot become more like Christ—Who is the Word—until we learn what the Word actually says.

© 2015 Robin L. O’Hare. All Rights Reserved. Permission granted for nonprofit and church groups to use this article in its entirety (including this notice). For other uses, please contact servinggodalone@yahoo.com.

Stay Out of the Survival Mode -- Philippians 1:19-24

Philippians 1;19-24


"For I know that this will turn out for my deliverance through your prayer and the supply of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, according to my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ will be magnified in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain. But if I live on in the flesh, this will mean fruit from my labor; yet what I shall choose I cannot tell. For I am hard-pressed between the two, having a desire to depart and be with Christ, which is far better. Nevertheless to remain in the flesh is more needful for you." (NKJV)

The world is getting worse and worse. Of course, it’s easier to find out all the things that are going wrong due to pervasive mass communication. But regardless, things are getting worse and worse. There are literally wars and rumors of wars, earthquakes, pandemics, corruption, and all sorts of evil things.

As Christians, how should we respond? There is a natural tendency to want to withdraw and begin to care only for ourselves and our loved ones. It would be easy to start hoarding all of our resources in order to "prepare" for the future. There are even Christians who are moving from here to there (or from there to here) in order to find a "safer" place to live.

Is that how we should respond to the world’s craziness?

Paul lived in a time when Christians faced suffering frequently. Many were poor and without adequate resources for daily living. Others were hounded and persecuted. Paul himself suffered through trials and persecutions as part of his ministry:

"With far greater labors, far more imprisonments, with countless floggings, and often near death. Five times I have received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods. Once I received a stoning. Three times I was shipwrecked; for a night and a day I was adrift at sea; on frequent journeys, in danger from rivers, danger from bandits, danger from my own people, danger from Gentiles, danger in the city, danger in the wilderness, danger at sea, danger from false brothers and sisters; in toil and hardship, through many a sleepless night, hungry and thirsty, often without food, cold and naked." (2 Corinthians 11:23b-27 NRSV).

Paul didn’t just live in the threat of suffering, he lived in (and through) sufferings of all kinds. Yet, his response wasn’t to run away and try to avoid the suffering. His response was to meet it head-on because "to remain in the flesh is more needful for you." His response was to embrace the Lord’s call on his life and to understand who we are supposed to be as Christians.

Why are we here? Once we have accepted the Lord as our Savior, why are we not just miraculously transported to Heaven? Because we each have a calling on our lives . . . and that calling is the same for all Christians! We are to pray and to make disciples. It’s as simple as that. We are to engage in spiritual warfare through prayer (Daniel 10) and we are to go into all the world, making disciples (Mark 16:15-18).

It’s natural to fear suffering and death. That fear is instilled within us, both socially and physically. But as believers, we know that this body is only a temporary home. It isn’t our eternal body nor should we treat it as something that is to be protected at all costs. Are we to be prudent with these bodies? Yes, of course. We are commanded to be self-controlled (Galatians 5:23), but our focus shouldn’t be on trying to maintain these bodies!

"Exercise yourself toward godliness. For bodily exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come." (1 Timothy 4:7-8 NKJV).

How do we exercise toward godliness? By being in the center of God’s will. And what is His will? That we pray and make disciples! When we focus on ourselves, on maintaining our lifestyles (health and/or wealth), on trying to avoid suffering, we are focused in the wrong direction! Yes, suffering has come and is coming to many. And where, as believers, should we be? Perhaps the best place might be in the midst. People who are happy and content are often unwilling to listen to the gospel because they are "blissfully" unaware of their need for God’s love. But those who are suffering? Those who are in the midst of trials and suffering are frequently more willing to listen to how much God loves them and wants to care for them. As Christians, we may miss our greatest opportunities for making disciples if we are focused on trying to survive, rather than throwing ourselves in the middle of the chaos and looking to the needs of those around us.

For believers, this life is always a win-win situation. It should never matter to believers that we die. We should live confidently, trusting the Lord:

"So we are always confident, knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord. For we walk by faith, not by sight. We are confident, yes, well pleased rather to be absent from the body and to be present with the Lord. Therefore we make it our aim, whether present or absent, to be well pleasing to Him." (2 Corinthians 5:6-9 NKJV).

Do we trust Him? Do we truly trust Him? If so, we will walk into situations of peril and hardship with confidence, knowing that He is going to take care of us! It doesn’t matter if we have nothing; it doesn’t matter if we are hungry; it doesn’t matter if we are at risk for sickness or danger or harm. What matters is that we, like Paul, learn to be content in the center of God’s will and trust Him to take care of us.

"For I have learned to be content with whatever I have. I know what it is to have little, and I know what it is to have plenty. In any and all circumstances I have learned the secret of being well-fed and of going hungry, of having plenty and of being in need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me." (Philippians 4:11b-13 NRSV).

It’s time for the Church to lay aside its fears and begin to live as if we really trusted the Lord to take care of us. It’s time for us to get an "eternity" view of things and to get serious about doing His will.

© 2015 Robin L. O’Hare. All Rights Reserved. Permission granted for nonprofit and church groups to use this article in its entirety (including this notice). For other uses, please contact servinggodalone@yahoo.com.