incline your ear to my understanding,
so that you may hold on to prudence,
and your lips may guard knowledge.
For the lips of a loose woman drip honey,
and her speech is smoother than oil;
but in the end she is bitter as wormwood,
sharp as a two-edged sword.
Her feet go down to death;
her steps follow the path to Sheol.
She does not keep straight to the path of life;
her ways wander, and she does not know it.” NRSV
You can’t turn on the TV anymore but that you don’t see an advertisement for something that is sexually-related. The ones I think I hate the most are from the online dating services, the ones where you can find your “soul mate” just by signing up on their website. One of the articles I read about online dating said that it’s possible that up to half of the people who sign up on online dating services are married.
It seems that many in America are looking for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, that few are content with their life the way it is right now. I wonder how many of those married folks on online dating services also claim to be Christians?
Sexual promiscuity, whether with our bodies or in our minds, is a real problem. We are barraged from all sides by advertisements and entertainment that exudes sex. It seems that you can’t sell a beer or a swimsuit or a pencil without the commercial having some kind of sexual connotation.
Is that how God intended sex to be used?
Even in Solomon’s day, the lure for the forbidden, unknown sexual experience was a problem. The first few chapters of Proverbs, while containing other lessons, focuses on the problems of being enticed by prostitution and adultery. Certainly, the lure of a “better partner” can be extremely tempting, particularly if we attribute the problems in our lives to those around us rather than to us!
“For the lips . . . drip honey and her speech is smoother than oil . . .”
Brad Paisley sings a great song: “I’m So Much Cooler Online.” The fact is that dating someone new can help us hide the fact that there are quirks in our personality that make us difficult to live with. When we meet someone new, particularly when we can hide our faults behind the anonymity of the Internet, it seems to fix all those things with which we struggle in those more familiar relationships. We can truly be that cooler, more popular and attractive person in an Internet relationship, whether the relationship be on a dating service, in a chat room, by email. Adultery always seems better because it is limited in scope; it doesn’t deal with the day-to-day realities faced in building a marriage and a family.
But the fact is, adultery leads to death. Plain and simple. It is based on a lie and lies are the tools of the enemy. “Her feet go down to death.” In the end, adultery (whether physical or emotional) will leave you alone in your sin. There is no hope for those who want to build their house on the sand, as attractive as it might be.
As Christians, whether we are married or single, we need to be on constant watch to guard our hearts. For me, it goes back to Philippians 4:7 again:
“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (NRSV).
The “peace of God,” or shalom, is that state of being right with God. In other words, it’s walking with Him, walking with Him, being in constant prayer, in constant communication with Him. That’s what will guard our hearts. If we are looking to Him for what we need, for what we should do, then we won’t take that first step to flirt with someone we meet online, to “just take a look” at that porn site, to just investigate what all the hooplah is about on that dating service. If we are keeping our eyes on Him and trusting Him to provide our every need, there won’t even be the temptation (when we are depressed or lonely or bored) to look somewhere else. He will always be all we ever need.
© 2008 Robin L. O’Hare. All Rights Reserved. International copyright reserved. This study may be copied for nonprofit and/or church purposes only without permission when copied in its entirety (including this notice).
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